Kraftwerk - The Model

This is an amazing single.

First off, it's got 'The Model' on it, which could very well be Kraftwerk's best song, and if not is certainly the song which best captures all the elements of what the group is about in an accessible and enjoyable three minute 'pop' song. With that in mind it's slightly baffling as to why it wasn't chosen as a single in 1978. Originally one on the highlights from 1978's The Man Machine it was a further three years before the song enjoyed commercial success in the UK.

'The Model' didn't receive a UK single release until July 1981, by which time Kraftwerk had released and were promoting the Computer World album. 'Computer Love' was selected as the second single from the album with 'The Model' included on the B-side. The single fared admirably, reaching #36 in the singles chart, but it was the B-side that caught the attention of the radio station DJs. After 'The Model' began to receive substantial airplay EMI reissued the single in December, with the same catalogue number, but this time with 'The Model' on the A-side. A music video was also produced. The re-issued single spent thirteen weeks on the charts and scored the group a #1 hit. However, it seems they were unhappy with the label's decision to release old material instead of focussing on Computer World.



Anyone who comes out with the tired old "soulless, emotionless, cold and clinical" response to Kraftwerk should listen for the melancholic yearning in this track. The lyrics speak of glamour, but the music tells the real story; the narrator is made to seem detached from that world, looking in mournfully at a girl whose success seems increasingly hollow and pitiful.

'Computer Love' is another great Kraftwerk track, now sadly more widely recognised as a Coldplay song. But before they got their dreary hands on the sparkling little riff and spread a thick, dull layer of grey jam over the whole thing it actually a rather sweet little song. It's rather light and whimsical in comparison to most of Kraftwerk's body of work; although quite representative of the Computer World album it is taken from.



Finally, the thing I love most about this one is the artwork. Slick, bold, bright and funky; it's just a great, iconic image; perhaps even better now than when originally issued.

Black Francis - Threshold Apprehension

This one goes THRESHOLD APPREHENSION! THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD THRESHOLD which is quite good fun. Then a female voice goes Threshold Apprehension oo-ee-oo-ee-oo-ee-oo-ee-oo-ee-oo-ee-oh-ee-oh-ee-oh-ee-oh-ee-oh-ee-oh-ee-oh in her best mock-Kim Deal tones. And I guess therein lies the justification for Mr. Charles Thompson to revert to his old Black Francis psuedonym. It just about makes sense on this track which has the old Pixies vibe and the backing vocals and Black Francis kind of screaming and all that, but a lot of the other songs on the album this is from can't really be distinguished from Frank Black stuff. So, the past few years Frank Black has been getting more country-fied and folky, but if you stood most of Bluefinger against late-90s Frank Black you wouldn't detect a huge departure. Maybe after the Pixies reunion Thompson just realised that Black Francis is a far more marketable name?



One thing this certainly has in common with previous Frank Black releases is the underwhelming artwork, a trend begun in 1996 on the 'so bad it isn't quite good, but is certainly quirky and interesting' The Cult of Ray; continuing on 1998's 'computer graphics from the Crystal Maze's Aztec zone' Frank Black and the Catholics cover; crystallising on Pistolero's subtle blend of shit photography and amateurish design; and reaching a nadir with Fast Man Raider Man: a bland and over-saturated shot of Frank Black that is truly grim to behold.

God, I'm really giving Frank Black a hard time here. I shouldn't be. I really like him. I feel like I'm one of the few who can claim to be a true fan, and not just a Pixies fan that has a few FB albums. But sometimes he just makes it so hard! Crappy artwork; albums coming at you left, right, and centre; download exclusives etc. It's too much! We were considering starting a campaign in 2003 to preserve Frank Black's legacy by introducing some degree of quality control after he released three full-length studio albums in the space of twelve months and quickly followed that up the next year with Show Me Your Tears. Not that every albums isn't brimming with great songs, it's just that to the uninitiated a lot of them can seem samey and lacklustre and if you collected the best twelve tracks from three years' output and just released that, well Frank Black would have some classic albums on his hands by now. Instead we get Honeycomb, followed quickly by a DOUBLE ALBUM in the same vein and then a live/odd and sods album the next year. It's just too much of a good thing.

Thankfully, the rate seems to have slowed as Black Francis hasn't released anything since the Sevenfingers EP in early 2008, which means I just might have time to go back and fully digest everything. This makes me kind of twitchy, though. I feel like Frank Black is merely biding his time and working away furiously on something huge that will be unleashed when I least suspect it, probably when I have a mountain of other things to do and cannot placate its demands for my time and attention, like in 2002 when we suddenly got two albums on the same day. *



The B-side of this single is 'Get Away Oil' which is exclusive to this disc. Unless you go to Black Francis' official website and download the mp3. But that would ruin the fun, right? This is a cool bluesy rocker with plenty of screaming and Black-Francisy bits. Just as any lazy music journalist would do in this situation where they don't really feel like describing or critiquing a track I'll pull a couple of established bands out of the bag and let you imagine the sounds. So, it's a bit like The Doors meet GG Allin. But only a bit. And not quite that good.

* Okay, I've just found out the Golem film project Black Francis has been working on scoring is going to be released 'soon' and will comprise FOUR discs of music. Egad! It does sound like a beauty: a signed and numbered book with DVD, two CDs comprising the studio score, two more CDs comprising a live performance and other nice deluxe thingies. Sounds like a must-have. Why do you do this to me, Frank Black!?

Tubeway Army - Down in the Park

Released in March 1979 as the first single from Replicas, ‘Down in the Park’ heralded Tubeway Army’s shift to a starker and more synth-driven sound. Both music and image seem to be highly influenced by Thin White Duke and Berlin-era David Bowie and electronic pioneers Kraftwerk. However, the music contained on this disc is far more sinister and distopian than anything released by either Bowie or Kraftwerk, and whereas pop acts of the early 80s that adopted the synth-pop style can now sound gimmicky and cheesy this melding of new technology and electronic sounds with post-punk guitar riffs has stood the test of time well.

The cover has a fantastic photograph that was later used as the cover of the Replicas LP. Gary Numan, with white hair and skin, stands like a mannequin, dressed in black, in an undecorated room with a bare light bulb hanging down, perfectly capturing the urban alienation that was a central theme of his work for years to come. A panel of the window captures his reflection and juxtaposes it against the moon, giving him an other-worldliness and suggesting the alien invasion themes that pervade Replicas. A bit too literal an interpretation of the song title is the inclusion of a huge neon ‘The Park’ sign, seen through the window. Not everything can be perfect, I suppose.

‘Down in the Park’ exudes a calm, frosty malice and is by turns creepy, menacing and brooding; stark, slick and cool, but also exhibits a wistful and melancholic nostalgia; the sound of looking back with regret and sorrow (most notably heard on the line “I was in a car crash or was it the war? Well I’ve never been quite the same").

Tubeway Army perform 'Down in the Park' on The Old Grey Whistle Test

The back cover is a close up shot of Numan’s eye, with a black bar for a pupil, hinting at themes and characters from the works of Philip K. Dick and further confirming the otherness of Numan’s new image and sound.

B-side ‘Do You Need the Service?’ is far more guitar-centred, but with repeated jabbing synths and an infectious rock drum pattern. Originally a non-album track, it has of course since been included on CD reissues on the album. More urgent and frantic than the A-side; if ‘Down in the Park’ is the menace, then ‘Do You Need the Service?’ is the paranoia.

‘Down in the Park’ failed to chart upon release, but follow-up single ‘Are ‘Friends’ Electric?’ scored a UK no.1 a mere two months later. Whatever you may think of Numan’s later increasingly industrial work, this single is an excellent and influential slice of early British synth-pop.

The Yodelling Comedians

Well, I saw this and I just had to have it. The Yodelling Comedians look like such a jolly bunch and are “TV Film Stage and Record Stars”. To achieve such extensive cross-platform media saturation you’ve got to be pretty hot, right? The record is also being touted as “Something Different” and I’m a sucker for that. It’s like a challenge. The Yodelling Comedians have laid down the gauntlet and I’m going to do whatever it is you’re supposed to next (either pick it up or thrown down a gauntlet of my own or something….never quite sure about that).

From the back cover it is apparent that this is a tourist souvenir from a place called the ‘Floragarten’ in Lucerne, Switzerland. I don’t actually speak Swiss, although I do have superior multi-linguistic skills, so I’m going to stick my neck out and say that the Floragarten is a Flower Garden and that the Yodelling Comedians appeared there ‘Live! In person!’ to entertain the crowds.

This lot are “known throughout the world,” although sadly seem to have now slipped in the publics esteem since a Google search returns two results for the “troup” and hopefully this post will rectify that and raise their profile and return them to their rightful place in the pantheon of musical legend. How can this be anything but amazing when it features “alphorn, cattle bells, (and) yodel?” I’m not sure that I’m too keen on the comparison to the music heard in a “Swiss peasant’s house,” but I’m pretty psyched up now to hear this thing.

The record comes in a U-shaped plastic bag, which I’ve rarely seen; it’s pretty cool and seems to make a lot more sense than a square paper sleeve. Why did this die out? Oh, well let’s check out the label: no date, sadly, but we do have some song titles to whet the appetite and some pretty vague line-up details: Leader: Freddy Pulver.” Now, I can see from the cover that there are plainly three members, but it looks like Freddy here holds the most clout which is why he’s the only guy that gets credited. So what does he play? “Alphorn – cattle bells – moving coins.” Moving coins? This is going to be some weird music if someone gets a credit for moving coins around on the recording. Yep, Freddy’s the man, all right and he’s even autographed the sleeve!

I don’t think anything could prepare for the disappointment that is the music on side one. ‘Water from the Glacier’ is what I guess is traditional Swiss music, all accordion and horn trumping and paring cheerily away. Where are the ambient sounds, though? The moving coins? Where’s the comedy? I was expecting the Swiss equivalent of Chris Morris’ Jam, not this crap! About half way in we get some yodelling for a minute or so and then it’s all over. The Comedians have already rocked us with ‘Water…’ and now they’re bringing us delicate introspection with the far slower “Yodelling is my Hobby,” which paradoxically features very scant yodelling. This could be track one just playing at 33rpm. Oh. Hang on. No, no it’s no mistake of mine, this really is just that dull.

Side two carries on in the same vein with ‘Glamorous Alpine World’ and ‘My Sweetheart Lives in a Chalet’. Some more yodelling here and there from the same one yodeller (do yodellers ever harmonise?) Where the hell is the comedy? I don’t ask for much, but if you’re going around touting yourself as the Yodelling Comedians, you better be ready to bring the funnies. Or just make some stupid noises like the Swedish Chef from the Muppets; I’m not a hard man to please, Yodelling Comedians, but you guys just aren’t even trying. Maybe you are better in person. Maybe the coin-moving is a riot when performed live.

I suppose I should be relieved to be spared 1960s Swiss humour, but when only one of the group is actually yodelling on this thing, and very occasionally at that, well it all seems a bit disingenuous. I want my 20p back, Yodelling Comedians! The only fun to be had from this record is when the needle gets stuck mid-yodel: “Yodellllooo-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop” and when your idea of fun is listening to a yodel over and over again you know you’ve been listening too long!

Amazingly, a quick search for the record label has uncovered an eBay auction for this record, but with a totally different cover! Oh, my God! Rarity! I like to think that mine is the definitive version, though. Recommended only for masochists!